beauty #19: first loves

day #3: your first love

SO weird that this is the topic for today considering whit-whit and i were talking about him just the other day! i've been lucky (or unlucky...depending on how you look at it) enough to have been in love just once in my life.

meet robert.

he was my high school boyfriend of 3 years. i was 14 and crazy about him. he and his family went to the same church as my family. he was a baseball player...ohhh yes. he was charming. so goodlooking. we fell for each other hard and fast. we were your typical high school relationship: completely consumed with each other. we woke up...called each other. met at school. he walked me to class. met after school. went to our practices...he game to my volleyball/soccer matches. i went to his baseball games. we would hang out after. go home. talk on the phone...and more than likely...fall asleep on the phone. then...start our day all over again. looking back now...it just seems silly and crazy. but that's just what we were...silly and crazy about each other...at least in the beginning.

time eventually began to take its toll on our relationship...and maturity. he was a year younger than i was...we started dating my freshman year and when my senior year rolled around...the realization of me leaving and going to college was starting to sink in and it wore us down. i still loved him and wanted to make it work...he had different plans. it was the day before thanksgiving...that night actually. we were on the phone...we had made plans to drive separate from my parents to alpharetta to have thanksgiving lunch with my family. then drive back to newnan later and have dinner with his family. we said i love you and goodnight and hung up the phone. about 1 minute later...he called back. weird. i answered and thats when i heard it: we have to take a break..i cant do this anymore. and so the pain began. i wont go into the rest of the details of our breakup...to sum it all up, i found out he cheated and that was the end of that. so like i said...lucky enough to have loved someone...unlucky enough to have had my heart broken and my world completely shattered. but only for a little while. life moved on and so did he. he is actually engaged now and i couldnt be happier for him. all i ever wanted was for him to be happy...thats all i will ever want. i was blessed that he was part of my life...i learned so much from our relationship and i grew as a woman because of him. looking back, i am nothing but greatful.

what are those lyrics? i wish that i knew what i know now...when i was younger. i wish i had known that smothering someone NEVER works. i wish i had known that i couldve spent more time cherishing and making memories with my friends. i wish i had known that in the end, the little nit-picky things really DONT matter. i wish i known that heartache is just that...an ACHE. i wish i had known that i could move on...im still stuck on the fact that im going to get hurt no matter what...so letting people in has gotten pretty difficult. but i'm still learning.

thats the beauty of any relationship.

beauty #18: waiting...

i'm 21. i'm a senior. and my life is about to change. it is going to be more different than it has ever been. and i find myself in the weirdest place right now. there are so many emotions...

i'm so excited. there are so many things i want to do in the one life that i've been given. i've been given this one chance to make a difference. to do something spectacular.

i'm so scared. i've never been on my own...i'm not that girl that has had to make it on her own. i've always had my parents...my family nearby...my close friends. and pretty soon, none of that will be the same. i'll be independent...

i'm so nervous. what if i screw up? what if i don't make it? what if all i do is disappoint everyone?...including myself.

i'm so pumped! i've waited for this time to come...i've dreamed about getting out there and really living my own life.

i'm stuck. stuck on the fact that i have no clue what tomorrow will bring.

so i started blogging as an outlet...a relief from my own life. an insight into others. a small comfort in this crazy world knowing that i'm not the only 20 something trying to figure all of this out.

so when i started blogging...i needed a name. all the blogs i followed had the most precious names ever...their names described where their writers were in their lives. and thats exactly what i needed. at the time, i knew that i was trying to make a change. i knew i needed to stop following what everyone else wanted...i needed to be a seeker. a searcher. and then i heard a song that pinpointed exactly where i was...in my relationship with God, my family, my friends. my relationship with life in general.

waiting for something beautiful -- needtobreathe

In your ocean, I'm ankle deep
I feel the waves crashin' on my feet
It's like I know where I need to be
But I can't figure out, yeah I can't figure out

Just how much air I will need to breathe
When your tide rushes over me
There's only one way to figure out
Will ya let me drown, will ya let me drown

Hey now, this is my desire
Consume me like a fire, 'cause I just want something beautiful
To touch me, I know that I'm in reach
'Cause I am down on my knees, I'm waiting for something beautiful
Oh, something beautiful

And the water is risin' quick
And for years I was scared of it
We can't be sure when it will subside
So I won't leave your side, no I can't leave your side

Hey now, this is my desire
Consume me like a fire, 'cause I just want something beautiful
To touch me, I know that I'm in reach
'Cause I am down on my knees, I'm waiting for something beautiful
Oh, something beautiful

In a daydream, I couldn't live like this
I wouldn't stop until I found something beautiful
When I wake up, I know I will have
No, I still won't have what I need

Hey now, this is my desire
Consume me like a fire, 'cause I just want something beautiful
To touch me, I know that I'm in reach
'Cause I am down on my knees, I'm waiting for something beautiful
Oh, something beautiful

everytime i listen to this song...i cant help but smile. and it gave me the idea for my blog..it's all about a SEARCH. a search for something greater. something amazing and wonderful. something more phenomenal than anything i've ever seen. the beauty of LIFE...it's all around me and until recently, i had failed to notice all of it. all of the blessings that God has placed around me. so that's how my sweet blog gots its name....and that's the meaning behind the name...all equally as beautiful.

beauty #17: M-E...ME!

day 1: introduce, recent picture, 15 interesting facts

well, most know my name is lauren. i'm a 21 year old college senior at the university of west georgia (west geezy to most of us though). i'm majoring in speech-language pathology and i am SO excited about my future. my parents A & R are the absolute best and i have one sweet little younger brother alex, who is a sophomore at georgia tech! this is what im looking like recently:

this picture was taken saturday at the georgia tech game...which they WON! whoop whoop!

im not REALLY that interesting...but some things you might want to know about me:

1.  im 1/4 japanese...even though you cant tell.

2. i WISH a had natural curly, blonde hair...when in fact my hair is naturally stick straight and dark brown

3. im a member of alpha xi delta...the BEST sorority i couldve ever asked for.

4. my dad was a high school football, basketball and baseball coach

5. because of 4, i LOVE sports and i loved being an athlete growing up.

6. i go by my middle name...my first name is sarah.

7. sarah was my daddy's momma's name and i wish my parents had called me that instead.

8. im the most wishy-washy person ever.

9. i secretly wish i was organized and a neat freak...but im just not.

10. im the ridiculously sappy, romantic type...even though i like to pretend im not

11. even though i am a die-hard georgia tech fan, i was born an auburn tiger and i will ALWAYS love it.

12. i always wanted to be married by the time i was 25.

13. i dont think 12 is actually going to happen.

14. i wish i was taller..at least enough to reach the cabinets in my house...being 5"1' doesnt really allow for that.

15. ive always considered myself a facebook addict...until recently. and now i am officially a BLOGGER addict.

**sidenote: i just got back from the BRAVES game with my best friends...and i cried HYSTERICALLY because is was bobby cox's last game as a brave. i just want to shout out to bobby now and tell him thank you for an amazing final season and for giving me an amazing story to tell my children one day! i was so honored and blessed to be at his last game and i will never forget it.**

hope everyone had an equally marvelous monday :)

beauty #16: the challenge

so everyone get ready...you're about to hear about 30 beauties of lauren's life!!

so i'll admit...my life is totally not interesting in and of itself...and all my friends know it.

so i'm going to do this 30 day challenge with a few other bloggie friends as a "get to know lauren" type of thing...and hopefully my life will get a tad bit more interesting once its over.

so here's the challenge:

day 1-introduce, recent picture, 15 interesting facts
day 2-meaning behind your blog name
day 3-your first love
day 4-your parents
day 5-your siblings
day 6-a picture of something that makes you happy
day 7-favorite movies
day 8-a place you've traveled to
day 9-a picture of your friends
day 10-something you're afraid of
day 11-favorite tv shows
day 12-what you believe
day 13-goals
day 14-a picture you love
day 15-bible verse
day 16-dream house
day 17-something you're looking forward to
day 18-something you regret
day 19-something you miss
day 20-nicknames
day 21-picture of yourself
day 22-favorite city
day 23-favorite vacation
day 24-something you've learned
day 25-put your ipod on shuffle--first 10 songs
day 26-picture of your family
day 27-pets
day 28-something that stresses you out
day 29-3 wishes
day 30-a picture 

So...everyone get excited to learn all about ME tomorrow!!

p.s....as you can tell...i have blog decorating a.d.d...hopefully this one will stick around a while :)

beauty #15: discoveries

like the blog says, i am searching for things that are beautiful in my life.

things that make me who i am.

and things i learn about myself everyday.

so here are some recent discoveries i have made:

1. i can MAKE my own beautiful header for my beautiful blog!!

i was so incredibly bored with that dumb picture i had and i couldn't figure out how on earth everyone got these cute headers for their blogs...so i started playing with publisher and voile! the finished product!

i am SO pumped that now i can make my own headers for my blog and they can go with the seasons! yay!

2. i am starting to learn what matters and what doesnt. for example, it doesnt matter that im single. im only 21 and i still have 2 more years of grad school....i used to be in a huge rush to find a boyfriend so i could be a cute little couple....but being happy with me is way more important. so love will just have to wait until God brings him to me.

3. i have GOT to start getting motivated in the mornings. the upside to having morning classes: i am done by noon-ish and i can come back and take a nap. the downside? i also know that after my nap i can shower and look cute that afternoon. my hero kristy keith (an alpha xi delta national advisor) would fall out if she saw me some mornings. she is head leader of what alpha xi delta's across the country call "the anti-dirty-girl campaign"...basically, NOT wearing tshirts and gym shorts with your hair in a mess on the top of your head (my attire almost every day). so...dear self, we are going to start getting up and getting ready and looking cute! (or else the above mentioned #2 will NEVER happen...duh!)



NOT cutting it...

4. my BIGGEST pet peeve in the entire world is when people make plans to do something and then back out on you. now ive always been a go-with-the-flow kind of girl...and i still am for the most part. and i understand that sometimes, things come up and plans change. but come on people! if you say youre going to do something....do it! follow through. dont make excuses. (i feel better now :)...haha!)

5. i have NEVER wanted to have a little girl...ever. i have always wanted to be the mother of three rowdy, rough and tumble boys that play football and baseball. yes i said three...i think little boys are awesome. BUT....my best friend stephanie has a little girl who is just about to turn one. my sweet little riley is the most precious thing ever and she just got her ears pierced! playing with her and loving her has officially made me want a little girl (in about 4573295 years of course) and my mom thinks its hysterical because i always swore i would never want a girl. but tell me...how on earth could you NOT want one of these?

isn't she adorable?!



yes...those are baby PEARLS in her ears :)



6. as applications to graduate schools approach, i discovered that i really wish i had worked harder in my core classes. dont get me wrong...i had a BLAST my first two years of school. but now...its really starting to bite me in the rear. and while my GPA isnt a complete disaster...it could definitely be a lot better.

7. final discovery of the day...im really not ready to graduate....i dont want to buy a cap & gown. i dont want to leave my best friends. i dont want to live on my own going to grad school. someone tell me how to stop time! wouldnt that just be great?

i was talking to my momma on the phone and i told her my head was telling me i just wasnt quit ready to graduate. she laughed and gave me a beautiful quote of the day...so i'll leave you with this...knowing that i do feel just a little bit better about things going on in my life.

"Your vision will become clear only when you look into your heart... Who looks outside, dreams. Who looks inside, awakens."
~ Carl Gustav Jung

beauty #14: luke bryan

so this past week/weekend was ridiculously crazy! thursday night...i attended the greatest thing that has ever happened to the tiny town of carrollton. it was so great....so wonderful...and so massive...that i'm not sure there were many people who weren't there. but if they weren't there...they certainly knew about it. it was LOUD, it was HOTT, and it was FUN!

thats right....it was LUKE BRYAN.



the sign on the side of the stage....yes, we were THAT close! :)

so about two months ago...we found out luke bryan would be making his way through the small college towns developed in farm country in the state of ga. and that meant his beautiful face would be in CTOWN! and to make things even better, we saw that the concert would be at the VFW fairgrounds! (FIELD PARTY!) we were so pumped....i bought my ticket that day! and we all had been counting down the days until he FINALLY came to west geezy. so on a cool, crisp fall day, we all got ready for luke bryan.

is he not the most beautiful thing in the world? well he is breathtaking in person and we had an absolute blast singing and dancing and rocking it out together. here's some pictures of the festivities :)



aren't my friends beautiful??



wLd...i love her so much!



my sweet little in my FAVORITE type of picture :)

my oh so pretty best friend....she LOVED the concert in the field atmosphere...so fun!

too much fun....the BEST interpretation of my life that i love

so after the most amazing thursday night of my entire college career..a night i will surely remember for the rest of my life....we had HOMECOMING 2010!! it was by far one of the best homecomings since ive been at west georgia. we got up SUPER early that morning to get ready...i did macy's hair, then emily's hair, then got myself ready. we had an open house for alumni to come and visit and then the parade started. my beautiful best friend rode in the back of a BIG jacked up truck and looked SO pretty.

emily's sign on JJ's beautifully jacked up truck :)

driving past us during the parade! :)

funny story!: logan, our male homecoming representative...who also happens to be one of my best guy friends from high school, stopped the ENTIRE parade so he could have this picture with dr. sethna, the president of our university. too funny! **please notice the beautifully jacked up truck again**

me and the bestie right after the parade...i was such a proud best!!



our last homecoming as undergrads!

 

eMk on the field...sooo pretty!

after the parade, a huge group of us went to the border to eat lunch...gotta love alpha xi delta tradition. then we went to the game and took the BEST nap ever. i had SO much fun with the best group of friends i could ever ask for. i will never know what i did to deserve their friendship or the opportunity to make the most amazing memories.

hope everyone has a beautiful, blessed sunday & week!